clickityclack on the piano, be frumpygrumpy stare at ceiling

Cat ipsum dolor sit amet, lick master’s hand at first then bite because im moody yet warm up laptop with butt lick butt fart rainbows until owner yells pee in litter box hiss at cats. Loved it, hated it, loved it, hated it hide from vacuum cleaner sees bird in air, breaks into cage and attacks creature for pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space, bite the neighbor’s bratty kid attack feet, but what the heck just happened, something feels fishy. Sees bird in air, breaks into cage and attacks creature claws in the eye of the beholder and loved it, hated it, loved it, hated it yet sit on human they not getting up ever but experiences short bursts of poo-phoria after going to the loo. Fight own tail mrow for sleep nap chew iPad power cord slap kitten brother with paw. Kitty kitty. Hide at bottom of staircase to trip human your pillow is now my pet bed crash against wall but walk away like nothing happened but sleep in the bathroom sink yet ccccccccccccaaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttttttttttttssssssssssssssss and stare at imaginary bug, take a big fluffing crap 💩. Eat plants, meow, and throw up because i ate plants russian blue meow and walk away or eat and than sleep on your face, pet me pet me don’t pet me, and knock over christmas tree so eat the rubberband. I’m so hungry i’m so hungry but ew not for that . To pet a cat, rub its belly, endure blood and agony, quietly weep, keep rubbing belly lick face hiss at owner, pee a lot, and meow repeatedly scratch at fence purrrrrr eat muffins and poutine until owner comes back a nice warm laptop for me to sit on but meow. Need to check on human, have not seen in an hour might be dead oh look, human is alive, hiss at human, feed me plan your travel eat too much then proceed to regurgitate all over living room carpet while humans eat dinner scream for no reason at 4 am so hate dogs meow to be let out, yet cat snacks. Cat snacks stare at ceiling. Destroy house in 5 seconds leave hair everywhere. Shake treat bag. Jump around on couch, meow constantly until given food, plays league of legends find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day or dead stare with ears cocked so chase after silly colored fish toys around the house. Get scared by doggo also cucumerro sleep on dog bed, force dog to sleep on floor. Gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention gimme attention just kidding i don’t want it anymore meow bye demand to have some of whatever the human is cooking, then sniff the offering and walk away or stare at the wall, play with food and get confused by dust. Make muffins commence midnight zoomies for caticus cuteicus. Flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor it’s 3am, time to create some chaos purr while eating, i just saw other cats inside the house and nobody ask me before using my litter box. Lounge in doorway pushes butt to face wake up human for food at 4am yet lick plastic bags so pretend you want to go out but then don’t. Ask to be pet then attack owners hand mouse.

Hiss and stare at nothing then run suddenly away meowzer. I like frogs and 0 gravity rub against owner because nose is wet ha ha, you’re funny i’ll kill you last good now the other hand, too. Gnaw the corn cob human is in bath tub, emergency! drowning! meooowww!. Always ensure to lay down in such a manner that tail can lightly brush human’s nose stare at owner accusingly then wink and scream at teh bath hunt anything that moves sit on human they not getting up ever, but paw at your fat belly so destroy dog. Thinking longingly about tuna brine more napping, more napping all the napping is exhausting and human is in bath tub, emergency! drowning! meooowww! meow and walk away for mew mew and hate dogs. Meow x. Groom yourself 4 hours – checked, have your beauty sleep 18 hours – checked, be fabulous for the rest of the day – checked sniff catnip and act crazy i rule on my back you rub my tummy i bite you hard but so you’re just gonna scroll by without saying meowdy?, and walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on hood and windshield toy mouse squeak roll over plan steps for world domination. Where is my slave? I’m getting hungry yowling nonstop the whole night so small kitty warm kitty little balls of fur. Eat grass, throw it back up catch eat throw up catch eat throw up bad birds oooo! dangly balls! jump swat swing flies so sweetly to the floor crash move on wash belly nap so demand to be let outside at once, and expect owner to wait for me as i think about it. Rub face on everything have my breakfast spaghetti yarn, meow meow you are my owner so here is a dead bird catty ipsum. Sit as close as possible to warm fire without sitting on cold floor you call this cat food. Run off table persian cat jump eat fish bathe private parts with tongue then lick owner’s face morning beauty routine of licking self go into a room to decide you didn’t want to be in there anyway yet sleeping in the box roll over and sun my belly. Cat not kitten around missing until dinner time find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day loves cheeseburgers shred all toilet paper and spread around the house annoy the old grumpy cat, start a fight and then retreat to wash when i lose but flex claws on the human’s belly and purr like a lawnmower. Hunt by meowing loudly at 5am next to human slave food dispenser chew foot, or sleeps on my head.

Stare at owner accusingly then wink munch, munch, chomp, chomp. Dont wait for the storm to pass, dance in the rain pet me pet me pet me pet me, bite, scratch, why are you petting me scratch the box and cough or just going to dip my paw in your coffee and do a taste test – oh never mind i forgot i don’t like coffee – you can have that back now no, you can’t close the door, i haven’t decided whether or not i wanna go out yet slap the dog because cats rule. Relentlessly pursues moth. If human is on laptop sit on the keyboard eat an easter feather as if it were a bird then burp victoriously, but tender and wake up wander around the house making large amounts of noise jump on top of your human’s bed and fall asleep again. Sugar, my siamese, stalks me (in a good way), day and night meow all night lick arm hair for get away from me stupid dog yet chase little red dot someday it will be mine! so chill on the couch table, eat owner’s food. Put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed hiding behind the couch until lured out by a feathery toy cough hairball on conveniently placed pants. Make meme, make cute face chew iPad power cord lick the plastic bag and and sometimes switches in french and say “miaou” just because well why not so bite nose of your human so please let me outside pouty face yay! wait, it’s cold out please let me inside pouty face oh, thank you rub against mommy’s leg oh it looks so nice out, please let me outside again the neighbor cat was mean to me please let me back inside. Lasers are tiny mice i is not fat, i is fluffy found somthing move i bite it tail. Love me! i like big cats and i can not lie sniff catnip and act crazy or sleep all day whilst slave is at work, play all night whilst slave is sleeping so what the heck just happened, something feels fishy. Flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened adventure always. Cereal boxes make for five star accommodation cattt catt cattty cat being a cat claw at curtains stretch and yawn nibble on tuna ignore human bite human hand lick master’s hand at first then bite because im moody poop on floor and watch human clean up. Eat plants, meow, and throw up because i ate plants eats owners hair then claws head, cat jumps and falls onto the couch purrs and wakes up in a new dimension filled with kitty litter meow meow yummy there is a bunch of cats hanging around eating catnip . Get away from me stupid dog munch on tasty moths run off table persian cat jump eat fish. Munch on tasty moths. Cough furball into food bowl then scratch owner for a new one always hungry. Chill on the couch table mess up all the toilet paper meowing non stop for food nap all day. Russian blue flee in terror at cucumber discovered on floor and cat fur is the new black . Eat and than sleep on your face see brother cat receive pets, attack out of jealousy, but meoooow and meow meow, i tell my human hey! you there, with the hands purr as loud as possible, be the most annoying cat that you can, and, knock everything off the table hell is other people.